Not Who I Used To Be

I am not
who I was
three months ago.

Three months ago,
I was not
who I was
a year before
when I started CPE.

I have changed.

Yet I am still the very same me I always was.

Last week I was going through a file drawer. I found the results from the psychological examination I had to take to start the process for ordination. The exam was 5 years ago. As I reread the results, I was surprised to see how accurate they were. I was also pleased at how I've grown in 5 years. I still have all the same personality traits, and I still have to be careful about control. The difference is not in my personality, but in how I recognize my personality traits and work to use them for the best or hold them in check when needed. Even how I cope with reading this glaringly accurate report has changed. When I read it five years ago, I felt condemned. Now I just see it as a report of the me God made and is still creating and recreating(next blog).

And for proof that I am still the same me: the fact that I was going through a file drawer. I love organizing. Most people like to be organized. I like getting organized. When I was a child, I would empty everything out of my closet into the floor of my bedroom and put it all back in a new more organized way. I have a life-long friend who once called me to please come organize her boys' room. Some things never change.

So over the Christmas break we:

• Added shelves to the Elfa Unit and alphabetized our CD's (lots and lots of them).
• Cleaned up all the loose papers (lots and lots of them) in my home office, and cleaned out one file drawer.
• Cleaned out and rearranged manBoy's room to accommodate his Christmas loot. Short of having the latest game system, he now has a teenager's electronic paradise. He needs 2 power strips to plug in all his stuff.
• G&T made significant progress in his office/music room. You can even see most of the floor.

Loving God, Thank you for gifting each of us in different ways. Thank you for my friends who have the gift of spontaneity when I'm busy putting things in order. Thank you for our home and the many things we have. Remind us that things are only things, relationship with you and with each other are truly important. Amen.